We are no longer who we were

We are no longer who we were.

written by Michael McBane

Do you remember when you encountered the love of God as your very own? If so, do you remember how free you felt? Did you think about how to become better, how to become holier or more pure? For me these questions were not a thought. Because I was not who I had been. I talked about this Jesus as if I had known Him forever and within His time I had but what I had been robbed of was now returned to me and I suddenly knew this enormous love that I did not have enough words for. I stumbled over my ability to describe my encounter but my joy held my words with a certain volume and authority. People gathered and listened. There were things that I did that suddenly with no rational reason I simply did not do them any longer. His love had taken me from a dark place were death was the goal to a place were life everlasting began.

So I have aged, matured as they say. Yes I may know more but I am not who I imagined I would be even in Christ. But do not ask me what that was supposed to be like, it just was not this man who became introspective and painfully so in particular seasons. I do not feel easy or free. In fact rather the opposite. I said, God I have a problem what is wrong with this picture.

God was so in and is in my being perpetually turned upside down. I simply needed and need to know and must be reminded that I can do nothing outside of God, He has saved me. That is my saving grace.

Today I want to expose an enemy of our sanctification. I ask that you walk with me as you read. Please do not disqualify yourself from my purpose because you are mature.

Let me be transparent. I have always been one who loved the disciplines of the Christian life, and I admit I still do. They do hold value but not in themselves. As time has flowed I became buffeted by so much that did not define the character of Godliness by Christians. In fact many seemed blatant to defy it. And this defiance that often left a train wreck behind it seemed tolerated. At first I was broken hearted for those who would be caught by the maliciousness of such indifference. I took some hits myself. There was a season of spiritual rape in some aspects of Christianity as men ran over other men in ministry. It was as if there was honor in dishonoring. Men crawled over men to establish reputation. serving without extraction was an after thought.

I saw that something was always added to Jesus to make Him adaptable to the church and the weight of this was crushing me. But I was unable to separate myself from the fallout of this for a season. But I see this as part of the erasing of my strength.

I accumulated sorrows and lost much of my joy as grace was either misrepresented or absent in the greater community. I asked myself often this is not the Jesus I knew? Witnessing much over many seasons I found that I was fraying and my character flaws were surfacing at times. I was uneasy with the life I often observed. At first I was shocked and concerned as I felt I was lacking a desire to engage at times. I can only describe life as God taking an eraser to much that had held balance for me but this was so because I,  hear this, I was able to hold life together because of what I had been trained to know and hold sacred. Life was snapping me in uncomfortable places. For lack of a better or lengthy description I will call it the law of character and morality that had a certain influence in and on me. I was leaning on Christ overtly but not on His Good News. I had forgotten He was Good News. I knew but had forgotten that He was and is all I need. Knowing is not believing. I was subtly becoming the influence in my salvation. My disciplines were running on empty, life was taking them from me as I was becoming increasingly jaded. Honestly life was pissing me off. People were no longer my favorite pass time. I wanted to hit someone, but never did. Thank God.

The idols of our life can be so sneaky and they hide within the fabric of life well. But God, because He wants us to enjoy Him fully will not allow anything including our disciplines to get between us and Him. Nothing can take the place of Him and what He has done. He is it, period. If we allow the things of life even that which seems good to establish us we will fall. So in my crash and burn, my great emptying out of who I was, my capabilities, morality, admirable character, gifting, etc, I was being loved. I was experiencing sanctification. God was working it out by making me very weak, indeed.

I have found that condemnation is subtle. It blankets us with a weight that begins to submerge us with lack. Lack of joy, lack of belief. We can bring it upon ourselves as if we are closer to God if we flog ourselves with ridicule. We can demoralize our character in religious humility. And here we collect suffering for its own sake. And I will note that if we were to be asked most more then likely would deny any of the mentioned. But our collective continence speaks volumes and the face of Christian life in todays world reveals a tired and beaten soul.

But Paul pronounces freedom to us in Romans 8:1, “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” And he brings this proclamation after presenting the battle of our two natures. He rejoices that he is alive only in Jesus Christ. For many have come to dismiss this verse as elementary and something those who walk in maturity should disavow with certain astuteness. There is a stench in such a mindset. For we can never leave His grace behind as if it were some sort of step to higher ground. The higher ground is again only Christ. To add something beyond is intolerable because in Christ the worlds are held together.

I discovered this quote which so expands my intent here. ”The heart of sanctification is the life which feeds on justification.” G. C. Berkouwer.

Paul continually directs the believer to this conclusion, we become radical in our obedience and in holiness not by diluting or diminishing God’s grace but by magnifying it. That is how Paul could tell us to pursue holiness. It was not our ability to gather such but by our dwelling under the wings of God’s grace where we are undone and we are weak but we are strong in unearthly ways because it is God who is our life.

What we have succumbed to is a failure to truly understand our identity in Christ. We have not accepted the privileges of our sonship and many who say they have walk with an arrogance that is all about them not Christ. They extract what they understand to be the rewards of salvation and wrap them around who they are. They use this to build a recognition of ministry profession. They use the things of God to enlarge themselves. Who we are in Christ is not this chest pounding arrogance but an essence, a fragrance that comes forth when we are drawn to His holiness and taken deeper as we gaze on such. It is here that we become holy and no where else.

What drives one to become Christ like? What gives one the desire to be done with lesser things? What allows one to give with out restraint? It is when we know and see Christ as the only substance of life. He is the Good News that allows us to live fully, because we live fully in Him day by day. Paul gave believers a vision to live above the immorality of this world by reminding them of who was in them. He preached the Good News up and out of them. Here he could say, now that you see this, this tangible good news, work out your salvation that God has given to you. Paul sets the qualities of Godliness before the believer and tells them to step forward towards such but in Christ. Because they were smitten by His grace. He tells them that to forget the qualities of what the grace of God has bestowed within you is short sighted if not blind. And in doing so they had forgotten that they had been cleansed of former sins. They had returned to self.

So we are required to remember this Good News. To remind ourselves and each other constantly to look up and remember. Remember as you break bread. And if we remember we will rightly discern the body. 

Our identity, our privilege is in Christ and what He has done. We have forgotten so much because we have turned against what He has done and attempted to accomplish it our self. We need to uncover the Good News and in this uncovering understand that first His obedient life, then His crucifixion and then His resurrection has gained everything. So then we need to walk out what we know intuitively within to be Godliness. We need to remind ourselves of the Gospel and then each other, daily. It is this that we preach in words and life. It is our overcoming grace.

Peter taught us well as Jesus called him out of the boat and onto the water. Peter did not hesitate or question, his eyes were on the one who call him away from the mundane daily life. Peter heard then and he was hearing that voice of life call again. Peter walked upon the water towards Jesus, he fell only when he looked at the water. Grace is Christ and nothing more.

I conclude that it would be a disservice to offer less then a God who has done it all to a dying world. We cannot afford to add anything or anyone to Jesus Christ. Come to Jesus and nothing more. That is who I first encounter. God has forgiven me for forgetting. Let us return to a grace that empowers us only in our weakness. This we can give to a world that God will call unto to Himself. We will gather in His grace.

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